Something Special About Us

I’m not sure if that’s what every generation says about themselves but I have a feeling that we’re doing much better than is expected from us.

When I look around I see young women not tolerating any bullshit from any man anymore. I see activists, people who want to be part of the country’s politics to be able to change something. To fix what others messed up. I see artists. Singers. Songwriters. DJs. Producers. Dancers.

I see young people having startups before they’ve finished high school. People who refuse nine-to-five jobs. People finding ways to make money with what they love. People learning from their mistakes and those of others. I see people no longer caring about what others think about them. People daring to be who they are. I see more uniqueness. More openness towards individuality.

But most importantly, I see a generation in which people have become aware of how important it is to take care of themselves and the people around them. We have started to reach out for one another. Started to accept mistakes. Started to accept that perfection isn’t an option. We have made ourselves a priority.

Now, how does that make us any better than any generation before us? I believe that the support and love I see around me is real. I see honest and critical minds. Less followers and more pioneers. I see refusal. Refusal to accept bad things. Refusal to accept that bad things must remain because “that’s the way it has always been”.

I see people who are no longer afraid of change. People who seek change. People who understand the necessity of change. And the necessity of faith and courage. The necessity to stand up for their rights. To stand up for those who can’t.

One of the truest tests of integrity is its blunt refusal to be compromised.

-Chinua Achebe

Be proud of who you are!! Please let us not be compromised when we can be so much more…

Invent yourself, CK

Choice

(Another 3 months have passed but there’s a lot I have learned living on my own, so you might forgive me for being inactive again.)

Everyone has them. Bad days that make you feel like nothing is worth fighting for, that life is just an infinite repetition of the same boring days. Bad days that make you forget all the good in your life. They cloud your mind, and have you thinking about nothing but the negative stuff you had to endure.

But these days, while they might be horrible live through, seem necessary to me. We need to feel terrible from time to time, to realize how lucky we are. To realize that we have been given a gift that we should cherish much more often than we tend to do. Because that is exactly what we do. We take everything for granted until it’s gone, then mourn about it and feel betrayed by life.

Truth is, we blame life for being heartless and unfair. We try to impose our rules in a game against an opponent who can’t lose. You can’t win a a game against life but you can learn to play by the rules, accept them and make them work in your favor. There is nothing you can do about being taken away things or people you love, you cannot get it back. But you still have a choice. You either choose to regret, live a life full of mourning that will only get worse and put yourself in a vicious circle, because whenever something will be taken away from you, that feeling of having wasted the good times will become stronger.

Or you choose not to deliberately destroy your own life. You come to terms with the transience of everything. You realize that while all the good times have an end, bad times aren’t everlasting either.

There is good in all bad and bad in all good.  Don’t bring yourself down by ignoring the good.

Some days are just bad days, that’s all. You have to experience sadness to know happiness, and I remind myself that not every day is going to be a good day, that’s just the way it is.     

Invent yourself, CK

 

 

 

Structure

12th February. My last post. It’s been 6 months since I last published, and I swear this has by far been the messiest time I’ve ever been through. I meant to take a small break from writing, to be able to focus on studying for my finals. Yet when exams were over, I somehow missed out on getting back to what I know best. There have been more ups and downs during these last months than ever before, and I feel like I should have never stopped writing to. And yet.. maybe it was necessary for me to find out that I need it. After all, we all need something to let off steam, some outlet that brings back balance to our life.

Anyway, I’m back now. And I mean to stay this time.

One thing I’ve learnt recently is that we all need some sort of structure in our lives. We need organization, something to rely on, because at times, when nothing seems to go our way, we still have something that makes us feel like we have at least some control over our lives. Structure is basically a precondition for one’s sanity. A mind that has no reference points whatsoever, eventually goes mad. These holidays, especially after finishing high school, being a main event in most people’s life, are wicked. For a lot of you, as for me, this is a time of major change and I can tell you that I am afraid of what is to come. I worry a lot, and at times feel unable to accept any kind of change in my life.

And yet, we can’t stop time, nor can we know what the future holds for us. All that’s left for us to do, is to stay positive, keeping both eyes on our goals and follow the flow of our life.

We have to be prepared for change, accept it, embrace it.

If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.- Maya Angelou

Invent yourself,CK

The past is a candle at great distance: too close to let you quit, too far to comfort you.-Amy Bloom

      About Nostalgia

If I had to select the worst kind suffering I have felt, it’d be nostalgia. There’s nothing quite like it. Once you’ve opened the door to look back and dwell in memories, it’s really hard to get out of this room full of memories, reminding you of better times.

Worst thing about nostalgia is, there’s no way to prevent it. Most often it’s a protective mechanism, trying to prevent suffering due to a current situation.

Seemingly irrelevant things,like smells, pictures or songs can be door openers to this memory chamber, that you won’t want to ever leave. You’ll look for hiding places between passed moments of joy and happiness and you’ll feel good, at least for a little moment, which is why you’ll have a hard time making it out of this room full of comfort.

Sooner or later you’ll have to come to terms with the fact that you can’t live your life looking back, nor is it possible to live your life backwards. This is why it is important to realize that when you feel nostalgic, it’s the result of unhappiness and dissatisfaction. Nostalgia is nothing else than a sign to get up and change your current life situation. Make it your goal to feel nostalgic on the following day and you’ll never have to endure this kind of suffering another day in your life .

Nostalgia is an illness for those who haven’t realized that today is tomorrow’s nostalgia.-  Zeena Schreck

A life spent in memories is a wasted life. A life spent in memories is a life spent in lies. Memories are never exact copies of reality, they show us what we want to see. The room filled with memories is an idealized version of our past.

Get out of that room.

Invent yourself,CK

To be or not to be

William Shakespeare, The Tragicall Historie of Hamlet

We are all trying to invent ourselves, to find out who we really are and be happy with who we are. Being an adolescent is a full-time job; as soon as you think that you’ve finally found out who you are, your brain feels bored and makes you reconsider your lifestyle.

You can never be sure about whether you’ll  stick to what you said or did. Your opinion changes as often as the hair color of any middle-aged woman, meaning  about every second week. (I would know,trust me)

The more convinced you are that you’ve finally found what makes you truly happy, the more likely it’s not. How often have you listened to a song of an until then unknown artist and thought that it would be your lifetime-song? I guess we all remember Donald Trump by Mac Miller. Haven’t heard this song since Rock-a-field 2012. My taste in music has since then changed at least 10 times,going from Dubstep to HipHop to Rap to the more commercial songs and back every 2 months.

But this is not necessarily a bad thing. Change is important and builds character. This is also why our surroundings do not stay the same. Where we tend to think that we did something wrong when looking back and realize we lost people we thought would stay a lifetime, we should accept the fact that we change; and so do other people.

A great percentage of our discomfort is based on other people, on so called friends we trust and think we can depend on as well as on people we consider enemies .I’m sure that most of you have had friends, whom you don’t even talk to anymore, whom you don’t even greet when you see them. But who’s to blame?  Is there even someone to blame or is it just part of growing up? We tend to forget that although we shouldn’t, we rely on other people. This is why our happiness as well as our sadness does not only depend on the way we think. I mean you can still try and be positive about everything that happens but from time to time, there is this abyss we fall in and think we can never get out of. And really often it’s linked to enemies, friends or lovers.

We’ll figure it all out, and we’ll find out who we really are. Trust the universe, it will work out.

This is why I’m starting this blog.  I’m gonna try to free myself by writing and I invite you to follow me on this journey.

 

Invent yourself, CK


 

This above all: to thine own self be true